Dear Jacob,
WOW the last post was 2013, but its only a post, there is never a day that goes by that I don't talk to you.
I can't say it has gotten easier as the time goes by, I still cry when I talk about you, I still remember memories of you as if they just happened, I still remember the day we lost you, I still feel the PAIN, that heart wrenching pain as if it just happened. That day still can still bring me to my knees in tears remembering how I was pleading to just let it be me.
February 1st 2021 will be 11 years, 11 years I wished to have seen you grow, wished I could have seen so many milestones, wished I could have seen you grow into man, watched you learn how to drive and wished I could have watched you graduate high school.
Dillon even says he wished he would have met you, had a big brother to play with. He will always have the memories we share with him, pictures of his big brave bother that is always watching over him.
Cancer is a word that we all hate, a word I wish did not exist. Because of that word, I continue to keep your memory alive, I continue to fight for so many other kiddos. I always hope my actions in all I do will make a difference no matter how small. I just hope one day I can say I was part of that movement to put an end to Childhood Cancer.
BECAUSE OF MY SON WHO BRAVELY FOUGHT THE BEAST CALLED CANCER!!
Jacob as I sit here and right this, Dillon is telling me he wishes you were here so he can have that big brother. Breaks my heart!
Love you to the moon and back, always and forever,
Love Mommy
